While she sleeps...

My life is usually divided into semesters. And in those semesters, there are 16 weeks. And weeks 13-16 are always overwhelming. This is the first time I've been able to experience these weeks with Little Mouse on the outside. It's definitely an adjustment! Even with only one "real" class right now (for which I still have one major project and presentation), I have other responsibilities like co-leading a study skills group for high schoolers once a week and seeing college students one-on-one to help them plan and prepare and meet their academic goals, and attending meetings at elementary schools to follow up on kids...

These things are good and I do enjoy class and even research and IEP meetings... but I'd rather be home snuggled with Evelyn in the rocking chair.

It's a good thing that many of these responsibilities will take a break come the start of May.

In the meantime, I'm sure that Evelyn will continue to do well. She seems to be nursing well, as she'll latch right on and eat and eat and eat now. I don't know if that translates to weight gain until next week when I go for my six-week follow-up and I'll have them weigh her.

She started doing this twitching thing in her sleep around Easter, and I wasn't overly worried about it until I had lunch with our pediatrician's wife last week and she asked if I'd mentioned it to him. I had Jonathan call immediately and the nurse he spoke with said it's totally normal and only a problem if it happens when she's awake. At the same time, unbeknownst to me, our pediatrician's wife called him to ask about it (she was out while I hung with their daughter) and he said it's nothing to worry about but is just the brain developing motor pathways.
Our other parental concern of late has been Evelyn's poo - or lack thereof. All the books and doctors say that babies who have breastnilk exclusively don't ingest a lot of "waste" and so at around one month of age it's normal for them to poo as little as once per week and still be healthy. But going from 3-4 poopy diapers per day to none, none, none is nerve-wracking for us. Evelyn doesn't seem to be one bit bothered. We've followed the nurse's suggestion to give her a warm baking soda bath and try to help her go but she still seems to be going on her own schedule of once every few days now. She's eating as much as ever and having plenty of wet diapers, so we'll see if the trend continues.

I'm trying to trust my mothering instinct, which isn't really telling me anything is wrong with the twitching or the pooping, so that combined with the doctor's reassurance is good enough for me.
Evelyn isn't sleeping for longer than 3-4 max at a stretch, but I don't really expect her to be doing anything different right now so I'm fine with it. Sometimes I'm grumpy in the middle of the night, but that's just my style. I'm always pretty cheerful in the morning, whether it comes at 5 AM or a teeny bit later.

And Jonathan and I are doing pretty well I'd say. We're at week 5 or so with either my mom or his staying with us and helping out, and they have both been wonderfully helpful. He and I haven't had any fights over parenting things and I still appreciate everything he does for me and Evelyn so very much. He wakes up every time I do at night to help her get back to sleep right when I'm finished nursing her, because it takes me a long time to get to sleep so he can rock her or shush her while I get myself back in bed. He brings me what I need while I'm nursing, and he is just the same funny and relaxed and supportive Jonathan that he's always been. At one month in, I think parenthood has definitely cut back our "relax together and do nothing" time but it has also brought a new side to our relationship. It's made me remember this body of research about coming together through difficult experiences and how the relational bonds that people make are stronger if those people have endured stressful times together. (This is why things like hazing sometimes "work" in that they lead to groups with really strong bonds - whether it's in the military or Greek system or wherever.) So this whole sustaining another life deal is stressful and hard but it's making us stronger and there are little pockets of joy and incredible love. And sometimes tiny smiles from the Mouse. And it's worth it.